Wrapping Around Him

     It had been a tear-filled couple of days by the time Christmas 2011 arrived. As I had done the previous year, I decided to get out of the house and hike at a beloved park. I bundled up, grabbed my daughter, and headed out for some sunshine to help combat my blues. What a contrast this hike was to last year's hike on the same day. While snow was in abundance before, there was not a speck to be seen a year later. Walking on, I didn't miss the snow one bit. How I was enjoying the crisp air! Relaxation swept over me as my senses hungrily took in all that was to be had. We weren't too far into the hike when I came to the above picture. I could hear Him whispering to me, Look at how the tree has wrapped itself around the rock. Am I not your Rock? Will you wrap yourself around Me in the same way?

I filed His words in my head somewhere, reluctant to answer Him right away. The truth of the matter is that I felt as if I were already doing my best to trust Him in the midst of surviving some curveballs that had recently come my way. How I missed my mom and wished that this time of the year would not be a marker of her passing! Two separate phone conversations with family members had stirred up fear and sadness in my heart. The car keys were lost. The cold water wasn't working in the bathroom. The refrigerator was leaking and needed either fixed or replaced. There was the leaky faucet in the basement laundry room, necessitating the strategic placement of buckets to catch four different drips. A gift card had been misplaced with a sizable amount of money on it just in time for us to purchase items for Dmitri's first ever mission trip within the week.

His voice stayed with me that day, yet I still did not feel like answering. Instead, I stubbornly continued on in my sadness. I woke up the next day prepared to drag myself through the remainder of 2011, and disovered my command for that week in my Scripture memorization program: "Rejoice!" Really??? I was feeling pretty grumbly and not wanting to cooperate with whatever the Lord was up to with me. In spite of a bad attitude on my part, I rolled up my sleeves and got serious about memorizing that week's Scripture.

The next day I went into the basement and discovered a totally thawed out basket of food sitting on the floor. John had taken inventory of what we had to eat and had forgotten to put everything back into the freezer. Into the trash it all went and fear knocked on my heart again. I felt panicked as I thought, "Wait a minute, Lord! That's the food You provided for us when we needed it. Just like that it is gone and I am left having to put my faith into action. Do I really believe that You will take care of me or not?" Yes, I believed that He would take care of me, but I sure wasn't liking the way He was going about it! I remembered His question about whether or not I would wrap myself around Him, but I still didn't want to think about it just then. The best I could do was listen to songs that reminded me of who He is.

The next morning found us discovering that we had forgotten to turn the refrigerator back on after cleaning it. Many things were a mushy mess and went right into the trash can. How could this be happening again?!!! Hadn't I just shared with everyone on Facebook how He had met our needs? What, was I now supposed to go back and tell everyone, "Yeah, that thing about God taking care of my family? Well, you can just disregard that."? We would still have just enough food to eek by, but I could feel even the smallest bit of security I had left slipping away. I was not feeling particularly cheerful as I threw the last two meat items in the oven to use before they went bad. I thought about the Israelites and how they looked to the Lord on a daily basis to meet their needs. Again, the command to rejoice came to me and again the thought of wrapping myself around Him came to me. "Okay, Lord, okay," I relented.

So just how is this wrapping myself around Him supposed to look anyhow? I purposed to lock myself away in my bedroom with the Lord and not come out for an hour. I opened the blinds to let some natural light in and spread my materials out on the bed: Bible, three devotions, pad of paper, journal, pen, pencil, highlighters. I started by singing the prayer to the Holy Spirit and moved on with my devotions. A myriad of household noises made their way up to me, making it difficult for me to concentrate. No matter, I was gonna stick this out! Little by little, the noises became less distracting until I ceased to notice them at all. I sang choruses that He brought to mind. I doodled my memory verses in code, adding splashes of color to help me remember them. I prayed. I dug deeper into verses when He caused them to jump out at me. Oh, it was a glorious time, but the hour seemed to be up way too soon. I was left knowing that God wants me to trust Him enough to praise Him when things are not going well for me.The times that I don't feel my best and when I feel the most fearful. No circumstance that I face can ever change the fact that He is God and worthy of my praise. I could sit and write for months and months about His majesty as revealed in nature or His tenderness in transforming this heart of mine into one that beats for Him.

One of the greatest things He blessed me with during my time of wrapping around Him was new eyes to see Psalm 89:15, which says, "Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim You, who walk in the light of Your Presence, O LORD!"  Hmmm... I just had to look up the definition of acclaim. Acclaim means to praise enthusiastically and often publicly; applaud. As I grow in my faith walk, this business of acclaiming Him is something that I have gotten better and better at. And, praise God, there is a promise of blessing for me when I do it. Just like the verse says, it is something that is learned. It is giving the Lord credit where credit is due, even if it means humbling myself to share my failings. I'm guessing that having a heart that rejoices in doing that has a lot to do with my ability to walk in the light of His Presence. And I really want that!

Lord, You are entirely faithful! You have cared for me in every way, always drawing me nearer to Your heart. Thank You for the precious promise that You will bless me when I acclaim You. Help me to always proclaim who You are and what You are doing in my life. Forgive me for allowing earthly concerns to harden my heart, causing me to stop up my ears to what You would say to me - the very things that would bring me relief. How thankful I am that You never give up on me! I am Yours, Lord, use me as You will. Only please soften my heart to accept (with joy) whatever ways You choose to work in me and through me for Your glory. In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen.